Saturday, July 25, 2009

The antithesis of a goal

I was thinking about goals (again) today. I certainly have my fair share of them, though they mostly fall under career and academic goals. I also thought about a more personal goal: getting married and having a family one day. Is this something that should be qualified as a goal or is it more of a dream? What is even the difference between the two? It seems to me that other people are too unpredictable to be incorporated into a goal. Obviously it's unethical to manipulate them, and even if you could, it would be a difficult task. So why even call this a goal? What makes me hesitant to call this a goal is because I'm not entirely sure it's something one can work towards, say like getting an A in course. Feel free to dispute this, I'm just thinking out loud.

Elements beyond my control are often what deters me from achieving something much more challenging, even though it might be more rewarding. You can control another person's feelings towards you just about as much as you can control the weather. I also think that this might be where the work component enters this equation. To reach the point of marriage probably requires some amount of work from both people. Compromises must be made. Discoveries occur. Change is talked about. Eventually a contract is signed.

And when I think about all of this, all of the contradictions and fluid answers are what makes it seem unworthy of my time and energy. As unromantic as this all sounds in type, I still find myself enthralled with the idea of it all, which is something that I doubt I will ever untangle.

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