Monday, February 09, 2009

the valentine

At Brownies tonight we made Valentines and roses from Hershey's kisses. One of the girls came up to me at the end of the meeting and gave me the ones that she had made. It's so adorable and so kind of her! It really made my day, and maybe what surprised me most of about realizing that was that the pick-me-up came from a 7 year old. This simple, random act of kindness really got me thinking about why I'm often so demanding about what I constitute as happy moments in my life. I had plenty of them today. The print room was actually open this morning. I bough a couple of used books. I was also able to make JM's day by giving him photos that I took of him. I'm inclined to think that it's a problem of being raised in a culture where we're taught that more is better and material surpasses all else. Yet the Valentine that Lorraine gave me, made me feel more special than any article of clothing I could put. In fact, knowing that she's thought of me means more that getting attention from any of the boys that I'm pining after at the moment. It's reminding me to keep my priorities straight.
It's also a good check point for me to get back on track to my optimism of last month. Well I suppose that it never really faded away, but rather it was tested at times. I have to say that I'm still much better off than at any point last year. Not only have I had plenty of happy moments, but I have lots of love in my life. And that's enough to make me complete.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Yaletown adventure

Yaletown may be my new favorite place in Vancouver. Karoline and I ventured down there last night. We've been talking about going to Goldfish, a lounge, since September and now I'm regretting not having gone there sooner. It was wonderful! Goldfish was exactly the sort of place that I envision my fabulous self hanging out in. It was posh and modern and fantastic food. We had duck spring rolls and chicken and prawn gyoza. The martinis were quite good too. The crowd was a bit older than us, and to be honest I really didn't mind it. In fact I find that I'm always repulsed from the Granville clubbing scene because of the seediness of boys my age. And despite this repulsion, I found myself wondering down to Granville street after Goldfish; the two martinis went straight to my head. Besides it was only 10 when we finished dinner, too early to call it a night. Crush was the place that Karoline and I finally settled on. It was nice, and the music was great. I'm not sure I'd go back, but that's mostly because I'm trying to expand my club repotire. We had a fantastic time dancing with some fairly random people and just being young; a trend that I'm a bit late on picking up.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

nothing exciting yet

It's Thursday and unfortunately the weather turned sour this afternoon. Sort of reflects the end of this week for me. I kind of figured that Law School Boy would have called today to make plans with me for the weekend, but it's 10:15 pm and I think that idea is now by the wayside. I guess there's always tomorrow as well. I know that he'll (hopefully) call when I least expect it. I was talking to my Nana about it today and she reassured me, as she always does, with her tales about fate always working things out to our advantage. I pondered this for a few minutes and thought of her stories about Nana Elliot, my great-great grandmother, who was told by a fortune teller that she would meet a dark man with a large piece of furniture. Soon after this Chobby, her future husband, returned for being station in Egypt in WWII with a clothing trunk. I know that she's right. Patience and time will work things out. But there's a part of me that wants to believe that the more proactive approach, seizing the moment, is the way to go. I am trying really hard to convince myself otherwise at the moment.
In an effort to get my mind else where, I've been mentally preparing myself for a marathon in the dark room tomorrow. I've got to do some film processing and attempt to make my first full prints. Very exciting. Saturday I'm going to try and get my other roll of film finished off so that this project can be done on Sunday. I also need to refocus myself on art history. I've been so dazed this week that I seem to have forgotten that I have midterm next Wednesday. That's okay though, I know I'll work hard this weekend to make up for it. Especially since I'm so close to getting an A in that course.

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Not so Mundane Mondays

This has been a particularly good week so far, and it's only Tuesday. Yesterday I was in The Boulevard and low and behold Rowan (the law school boy) was there. After getting my coffee and settling down at my table across the coffee shop, I realized that I should probably talk to him. I then began to panic, I mean I haven't had that many conversations with him but this was also another window of opportunity to be proactive about my dating life. My solution to this was to get a glass of water and then walk by his table. So I did. He smiled at me and I nearly felt myself freeze completely. He asked how I was and how my Christmas break was and about my classes were this semester. Nothing beyond the trivial but that was okay. I don't think I had enough of a grasp over myself to say anything of substance. Inevitably there was a lull in the conversation and I said, "Well I'd better get back to work," and shamefully walked back over to my seat.
I couldn't believe that I didn't say anything like, "Oh we should hang out sometime." Karoline, who witness this entire thing from another table at The Boulevard, immediately text messaged me to ask what was said. I was shaking and told her nothing. After a good ten minute pep talk, she convinced me that I had to go over there and give him my number. I felt like a fool going up to him again, but knew I would be disappointed in myself if I didn't. So I went back for another glass of water with my name and number in hand and stopped at his table once again and said, "You know, we should really hang out sometime." He replied, "Definitely." Karoline told me that he had a smile on his face as I walked away, but I don't know if it was sincere happiness or smirking at my forwardness and general immaturity. Regardless, I was proud of myself even though it took Karoline putting me up to it. I have to say though that the best part was a little while after that, he came up to me as he was leaving and said, "I'm off, but I'll call you soon." All I could really do was smile, but I found it in myself to nod and say goodbye.