Saturday, November 01, 2008

Real or Rebound?

I'm in the midst of a crisis at the moment. I'm feeling stuck in this in between state of being over someone and moving on. And I think what's keeping me here is that I'm afraid that in choosing one or the other, I'll will choose the wrong thing and regret it forever. This all started because I was talking with a coworker last week about my ex and she happened to say, "how funny would it be if he was the one?" And sure she said it in a joking manner, but it's planted a seed of doubt in my mind about solidifying things with the guy that I have been dating for about 2 months. We haven't had "the talk" yet and now I'm a bit hesitant about it. I think it maybe that I want to make sure that I do want to be with him, and I really want to be. So much. But my intuition about it is different somehow from the last time I got involved with someone. It was like everything fell into place perfectly, and this time it seems like I have to shape things a bit more. I don't think I would go as far to say that I'm trying to convince myself that I like this guy. But I guess I'm just trying to reconcile how romantic relationship take so many different forms in their early stages. Plus I also feel like I keep comparing this time to the last, which isn't fair because they're completely different people. So I guess my question of crisis is: How do you know the difference between something real and a rebound?
I think that perhaps rebound relationships are more lustful and purely physical. And usually driven by a vengeful desire to be the first to move on. I guess I've never had a true rebound. I tend to try to work things out on my own and for a very long time. Like a friend told me, if this new boy is a rebound, it may be the longest rebound relationship in history. I don't think it is because I really do like him, but don't have any way of make sure this isn't some well played out illusion in my mind.

1 comment:

Vanessa said...

It's real. For sure.