Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Struggling

In the past year and a half since I've moved to Canada, I've lost about 60 lbs. I'm struggling at this moment to maintain all my hard work. It's hard not to sabotage it but I know that in the long run I'll be grateful to myself for showing a bit of self control with food. I think for me, my weight loss has been about avoiding all the health problems that people in my family have had in relation to being obese. After I lost a lot of weight last year, my dad decided to as well. I was really proud of him for doing as well as he did, however he hasn't been able to maintain it at all. I want to prove that I'm not like that. That I am stronger than that. I know what needs to be done and now all I have to do is do it.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Proceed with Caution? No, Sensibility.

It's been an interesting past few months. I'd like to say that I've gained perspective on everything, but it's too soon to say. I alone now for the first time in a while, and although I'm feeling a bit weak on my feet I think this will only make me stronger. I am a bit angry and there's no telling how long it's going to take me to get over this. I guess it's true that you never know how much you love someone until they are no longer there. I know that I loved him just as much now as when we were together; but that was the difference between us. I always knew how I felt and where I was going. Maybe it's true what they say, if you don't know where you're going you'll end up somewhere else. I think I might have been too jaded to even acknowledge that I hadn't a clue what it was that I really wanted.